When I Say 'I'm Sorry'
by VampireXHeart2442
Summary: Hunter reads John Shawn's memories he wrote down in a book. John never knew Shawn went through so much with Kayley.


**This is one of the one-shots from 'Actions Speak Volumes' but I am still going to write the other two, this focus' on Shawn Michaels, it's told by Hunter Hearst Helmsley.**

* * *

_Sorry – Daughtry_

Hunter closed the book Shawn had given him about the Legacy of the Michaels' when Shawn had retired from wrestling. Shawn had filled it full with memories of his life, mostly about Kayley and how hard it was to leave her behind all those years while he was working for the WWE. At first, it was incredibly difficult for him to read since he had been there for most of it too, already knowing what Shawn had gone through and what Kayley had also gone through. He had seen Kayley grow up from a fragile little girl who was scared for her father to a full blown woman who made her own choices and put up with the consequences later. Hunter was proud of her.

He had seen his best friend go through tough times more than he thought about his wife. He had been with Shawn most of the time, watching him crash and burn and come back. He was re-born in 2002 and Hunter was forced to turn on him, to make sure he was truly the new man he claimed to be. Needless to say, Shawn had told the truth.

"Hey Hunt." John said coming into the room. "What you reading?" He asked, bending down to look at the cover of the book.

Hunter raised it so he could see. "Shawn gave it to me when he retired."

John nodded and got his bag, sitting down to dig through it. "What's in it?"

Hunter watched him as he answered. "Memories and thoughts."

John nodded again and leaned back in the chair. "Would Shawn mind if you read me some?"

"Nah, he wouldn't." Hunter replied, opening the book,

"Thanks man."

Hunter nodded and cleared his throat to start reading, "Well…"

_Will you listen to my story?  
It'll just be a minute  
How can I explain?  
What ever happened here  
Never meant to hurt you  
How could I cause you so much pain?_

_2010  
24 Years Old_

Shawn watched his daughter laugh and fool around with her fiancée in the front yard of the Michaels' Estate. He had been staring out the same window for 10 minutes, watching Kayley smile like she never has. She was truly happy with John Cena and, of course, he was happy for her, but he always knew she deserved so much better. Actually, according to him, no one would be good enough for _his _daughter.

He turned away from the window, sighing quietly and walking to his bedroom he shared with his wife, Rebecca, though, Rebecca and the kids weren't at the house at the moment. He looked at all the family photographs, thinking about how fast Kayley had grown up. She wasn't a little girl.

But she will always be _his _little girl.

When I say I'm sorry  
Will you believe me?  
Listen to my story  
Say you won't leave me  
When I say I'm sorry  
Can you forgive me?  
When I say I'll always be there  
Will you believe  
Will you believe me?

_1999  
11 Years Old_

"Daddy!" Kayley came running down the driveway to meet Shawn, who had just gotten out of the car. "You're home!"

Shawn caught her in a hug, holding her small body to his muscular form. "Only for a little bit."

Kayley pouted and let go of her father. "But daddy, you're never home." She whispered. He sighed and nodded at his daughter. "I wish you would stay longer than two days."

Shawn looked into the bright blue eyes of Kayley, realizing for the first time how much she looked like him. "I know, but this is my job baby girl. I have to do it."

"I know." Kayley said quietly. "I just want to spend more time with you since Mommy isn't here."

Shawn kissed her head, ruffling her blond hair. "One day, you'll understand why I'm always gone. Until then," Shawn held her little hand in his own. "When you're lonely and you want Daddy home," He pointed to her chest. "You can find me in here."

She smiled. "You're always in my heart, Daddy."

All the words that I come up with  
They're like gasoline on flames  
There's no excuse  
No explanation  
Believe me  
If I could I'd undo what I did wrong  
I'd give away all that I own

_2002  
14 Years Old_

"She misses you Shawn." His mother told him quietly as she finished the dishes.

Shawn nodded and leaned on the dining room table. "I know."

His mother dried her hands and sat down across from him. "You should take some time off." She looked at the kitchen door. "Your daughter needs her father."

"Mom, I need to work, this is what I wanted since I was a little boy and now that I have it, I can't just let it go." He replied glancing up at her.

"Don't be selfish Shawn."

"I'm not!" He yelled.

"Calm down." His mother scolded. He sank into his chair like a little child who was just caught with his hand in a cookie jar. "I understand how important this is, but you have a child to care for now, you have to sacrifice things."

Shawn stayed silent.

"What's more important, your career or your daughter?"

He looked up at his mother. "I'm not sure."

The door slowly opened and Kayley stood in the door way, tears in her eyes as she stared into Shawn's eyes. "I hate you."

Shawn looked at his daughter, rising from the chair. "Kayley, I didn't mean-"

She walked away and up the stairs.

When I say I'm sorry  
Will you believe me?  
Listen to my story  
Say you won't leave me  
When I say I'm sorry  
Can you forgive me?  
When I say I'll always be there  
Will you believe  
Will you believe me?

_2005  
17 Years Old_

Shawn walked into his mother's house and smiled at his daughter, who was now living with them since he was never home. "Hey kiddo."

She nodded her head in his direction. "Dad."

He sighed and walked into the living room, sitting on the couch next to his daughter. "I'm sorry." She made a noise in response. He sighed again. "Kayley-"

"What do you want me to say, Shawn?" She replied, Shawn flinching at his name. "That it's okay that you're away for so long? That you banned me from seeing Randy, John, and being backstage at your shows? Huh?"

"Kayley-"

"No, dad!" She yelled. "I have a life too, ya know! Randy was a good friend and you ruined it! John is my best friend yet you don't let me see him!" She looked at him. "Dad, I need to see him. I miss him."

Shawn looked at her and ran his hand through his hair, thinking of what to say to her. "Look, I know you want to see them but now is not a good-"

"It's never a good time." She mumbled, interrupting him.

"You have to understand that backstage is not safe for a teenage girl." Shawn shuddered at the thought. "Do you know what could happen?"

"You taught me how to defend myself."

She got Shawn there; he had taught her the basic moves of wrestling and how to take someone down. Shawn leaned back against the cushion of the couch. "Fine, look, there is a taping in Houston tonight and if you want to go, I'd get dressed right now."

Kayley smiled and ran upstairs to get ready.

_If I told you  
I've been cleaning my soul  
And if I promised you  
I'll regain control  
Will you open your door  
And let me in?  
Take me for who I am  
And not for who I've been._

_2007  
19 Years Old_

"Shawn, you're suffocating her." Hunter said, sitting on the bench. "She's 19."

"I know how old she is." Shawn replied. "If you're here to remind me of her age, I assure you, I knew that long before you announced it."

"Are you sure?" Hunter asked, watching him, ignoring his sarcastic reply. "Because you don't seem to realize she isn't a child anymore."

"She will always be a child in my eyes." Shawn told him. "She's not ready."

"Ready to become a wrestler?" Hunter laughed. "Of course not! We were never ready, we just did it. I don't think anyone was ready when they got the chance."

"She will not become a wrestler." Shawn replied sternly.

"Why not? She has a lot of potential." Hunter said. "She takes after you, ya know. Remember she out me in that ankle lock when she was like 7 years old? She made _me, Triple H, The King of Kings, The Game, _tap _out!_"

Shawn rolled his eyes and got ready to go out into the ring. "She may take after me, but she will not become a wrestler, not as long as I'm livin'."

Hunter rolled his eyes this time, astounded by Shawn's thick-headedness. "Look, Shawn, she's a sweetheart, she's smart, beautiful, and has all the talent in the world-"

"She is _not _becoming a wrestler, Hunter, that's it."

Hunter stood up and walked over to him, putting his hand on his shoulder. "Look, whatever misplaced self-righteousness you have inside you, you have my sympathy, but if she wants to become a wrestler, she will. You aren't the only one who watched her grow up. I was there too."

Shawn sighed and turned around, facing his best friend with tears in his eyes. "I wasn't there for so many years."

Hunter pulled Shawn into a hug, rubbing his back as he cried into his chest. "I know." He tried to calm him down. "You're here now; you have to make the best of it. She understands. She's the most understanding person I know; she knows that it was hard for you to leave her in that driveway all those times. She knows you love her."

"I will always love her, Hunter."

"She loves you and will always love you. She's forgiven you for leaving her." Hunter said.

He nodded against his chest, trying not to cry anymore. "I just hope she knows I am not the same man I was, that I'll never leave her again."

"She knows that." Kayley said from the door, looking sadly at the two main men in her life.

Who I've been...

_Hunter and John_

"Shawn lay down on his bed, looking at the ceiling. He always knew his daughter would grow up to be a wrestler; he just didn't want to accept it. He wanted his daughter to become a lawyer or a singer, something like the other kids in her class wanted to be. But Kayley was always different, with her dad in the wrestling business, it was going to happen.

Shawn used to be a drug addict and a drinker, not caring what happened around him as long as it didn't affect him, he didn't care one bit. He was always careful around his daughter, trying to shield her from the harsh reality life handed over. He didn't want her to see him like he was.

During the years of 1999 through 2002, Shawn had a back injury that forced him to retire and replace Sgt. Slaughter as WWF Commissioner. He was still very active in the wrestling business but he did not get into that ring to wrestle. During that time, he cleaned his life up. He became a new man, someone his daughter could finally be proud of.

He hoped she was proud of him." Hunter read.

John stayed still, listening intently to the story Hunter was reading him. He never knew how deep Shawn actually was when it came to his daughter, but now he knew. "Please, continue."

Hunter nodded and turned the page.

When I say I'm sorry  
Will you believe me?  
Listen to my story  
Say you won't leave me  
When I say I'm sorry  
Can you forgive me?  
When I say I'll always be there  
Will you believe?

_2009  
23 Years Old_

John went up to Shawn after Shawn's match, "Shawn, I have to tell you something."

Shawn looked at him, grabbing a water bottle and taking a sip. "What?"

"Your daughter just super kicked Randy Orton in the locker room."

Shawn's eyes got wide and his mouth dropped. John thought he looked quite comical. His water bottle dropped and he ran down the hall. John watched him, laughing quietly. Shawn stopped, turned back around and faced John. "Where is she?"

"I locked her in Stephanie and Shane's office."

Shawn nodded and took off. Hunter walked up and slapped him on the back. "What's up with Shawn?"

"Well, he just found out Kayley super kicked Randy." John replied.

Hunter laughed hysterically, holding onto John for support. "She-she-super kicked Orton!"

John cracked a smile at his laughing friend. "Yeah."

He laughed harder. "God, that kid just makes my day all the time."

John chuckled, Hunter's laughter was contagious. "She does know how to make a statement."

"Well, Orton was in need of a good super kick." Hunter said, composing himself.

John nodded, agreeing. "We should go rescue Kayley, if it's not too late."

Hunter nodded and they walked down the hall to Stephanie and Shane's office.

When I say I'm sorry  
(When I say I'm sorry)  
When I say I'm sorry  
(When I say I'm sorry)  
When I say I'm sorry  
Can you forgive me?  
When I say I'll always be there

_2011  
25 Years Old._

Shawn watched his daughter get ready for her big wedding day, the day all little girls dream about when they realize that you get to dress up. She looked gorgeous. Her dress fit her perfectly and her blond hair was down in waves, framing her face. He looked at the ceiling, praying to God that he gave him the strength to make it through this heartbreaking day.

"Dad, how do I look?" Kayley asked, turning to face him.

Shawn choked back tears and cleared his throat. "Like an angel."

She smiled, satisfied with his answer. Maryse fixed a piece of her dress before smiling at her best friend. "I'm ready."

Shawn sighed and walked out of the room with Kayley to the doors of the main room. He hook his arm around hers, holding it to his side protectively. "Ya know," He cleared his throat again. "I can always beat him up."

Kayley laughed and smiled. "You won't have too."

Shawn looked down at his little girl, who was soon to be Kayley Cena. "He'll never be good enough." Kayley looked up at him. "You will always be my little girl and no man can ever take you away from me."

She smiled and kissed his cheek. "I love you Daddy."

Shawn let a few tears slip before quickly wiping them away. "I love you too baby girl. Always and forever."

She smiled and the music started.

When the doors opened and the people stood up, Shawn couldn't help but feel his emotions coming forth, displaying on his face for the world to see.

But the moment that killed him, was when he finally let his daughter go and gave her over to John Cena.

"I'm sorry." Shawn whispered to himself.

_Will you believe?_

_Hunter and John._

"Why did he say 'I'm sorry'."

Hunter sighed and set the book down. "He said it because he promised he'd never let her go, but he did, to you." Hunter motioned to him.

John sighed and nodded. "Shawn had no reason to say 'I'm Sorry', if anything, I should because I took his daughter away."

"He'll never say it but I know he is damn proud you are his son-in-law. He knows you will take care of her but to him, you will never be perfect for her."

John nodded. "I understand."

Hunter laughed and shook his head. "Nah, you don't, but you will. When your daughter grows up, you will."

John nodded. "I don't want Destiny to grow up, Ayden either for that matter."

Hunter chuckled. "I don't want my kids to grow up, hell, I didn't want Kayley to grow up but she did."

"How did you get through it?" John asked.

"I didn't."


End file.
